Chapter 43: Opening the Heavenly Eye

  I rode a motorcycle with a bicycle placed in the basket, the handlebars sticking out like a submachine gun. At an intersection waiting for the red light to change, a tricycle rider came from behind and stopped beside me after applying the brakes. He looked at me and said: "Brother, turn around up ahead, once you enter the 3rd Ring Road, this vehicle is not allowed to run."

  I said: "Haven't heard of it, aren't they still producing Kaido now?"

  The tricycle master shook his head and said, "Three rings can't run with three wheels. Besides, this car should be scrapped - to commemorate the 10th anniversary of the victory of the Anti-Japanese War?" He looked at the words engraved on my motorcycle and exclaimed in surprise, "This is a product of '55?"

  I just realized that the tricycle driver kindly reminded me: "If you don't want to take a detour, you have a bicycle, right? Just tie it with a rope and pull the motorcycle along, no problem."

  I said: "With 5 wheels, nobody is in charge?"

  Master said: "You're so lucky, you want to open 15 traffic police cars and they still have to salute you."

  I thanked the master after, but didn't listen to him, anyway this car has no license plate.

  I parked my car at the street corner, then took out my bicycle and pushed it in. I saw that the mahjong hall was open, so I went in and found Old Zhao playing with Liu Bang. I handed him the car keys, and Liu Bang followed me out of the door, smiling smugly. I asked him, "How much money did you win?"

  "I don't want to win their money today, I'll let them off easy, or else nobody will play with me in the future."

  I said: "What are you laughing at?"

  Liu Bang sneered: "You're done for." As he said that, he turned around and ran inside.

  I quietly entered the pawnshop and saw Li Shishi intently playing on the computer. I sneaked up behind her, startling her so much that she broke out in a sweat. She had opened my D drive and was looking at the swimsuit beauties inside. I said from behind her, "Is it nice to look at?" She let out an ah and hastily closed the webpage, seeing it was me, her face turned red as she asked, "How did my photos end up there?"

  This time it was my turn to be uncomfortable, and Li Shishi lightly bit her lip and said: "You're showing off for others..." I thought she would say something like "I'll die just for you", but who knew she'd say "...I'll take a few good photos of you." My eyes narrowed and lengthened, the corners of my mouth curled up in a silly smile, Li Shishi suddenly ran lightly upstairs, giggling and saying: "Brother-in-law, you're done for."

  I was even more puzzled, and followed upstairs to see Jing Erzai standing at the staircase, he saw me and didn't say anything, but just smiled at me with a "heh heh heh", this kind of brainless person was sneering at me, the scene was very eerie, I started to feel that the atmosphere was terrifying, wanted to find someone reliable to ask, didn't expect Qin Shi Huang to shout at me while playing games: "Qiangzi, you're done for."

  When I pinned my last hope on Xiang Yu, who was lying on the sofa, he opened his two big hands and shook his head helplessly. I sat down beside him and asked in a flattering tone, "Xiang Ge, do you still like bread?" Xiang Yu's eyes lit up, and I asked him in a low voice, "What's wrong after all?"

  Xiang Yu said with a heavy heart: "You really shouldn't have forgotten what day today is."

  "Huh? What day is today?" I scratched my head and said in bewilderment.

  At this time, Baozi came back, holding a big cake in his hand, went upstairs and put down the cake, leaned against the stairs to change shoes. I rushed up and Baozi glanced at me saying "Are you back?"

  It's still better at my house, no sooner had we met than she cursed me. Baozi was changing her shoes and grumbling discontentedly: "Damn it, today I'm having a birthday, but the cake is something I have to buy myself..." I said carelessly: "Oh, you're having a birthday? First tell me what day it is today?" Then I knew I had made a mistake, a deep one...

  Baozi gently placed one hand on the back of my head, then pushed me hard against the wall with a "thud". My head hit the wall and I felt a lump rising. Baozi said viciously: "Tell me honestly, where did you sneak off to last night?"

  I'm Xiao Qiang's brother, I won't easily get along with her. I stick my arm under her nose: "Take a sniff, take a sniff."

  Baozi sniffled, furrowed his brow and looked at me. I said with a smirk: "Smelly, right? You say I smell like a skunk, where can I go? Yesterday I helped a buddy move."

  "Moving house at more than two o'clock in the middle of the night?"

  "...... Yeah, won the lottery, have to move quietly."

  "How much did you spend?"

  "5 bucks!"

  Baozi knew I was joking with her, but she didn't suspect that I was up to no good either. She glanced at me with her eyes and said: "You're so virtuous!"

  I hugged her and whispered in her ear: "If you still don't believe me, let's go inside and try it out, see how much your man can handle."

  Baozi saw that everyone in the family was sneaking glances at our movements, and unnaturally pushed me away. She couldn't help but say, "Damn it." I smiled mischievously and approached her again to tease her, but then Liu Bang swaggered upstairs, saying, "What bad luck!" I asked him what was wrong, and he said, "I didn't even lose 5 yuan this whole afternoon, now except for Old Zhao, no one wants to sit at the same table as me."

  Baozi said: "Everyone is here, let's call out to eat cake."

  Baozi considered the crowd and bought a cake as big as a manhole cover. We all stared at it, wondering what to use to cut it. The plastic knife in the box was useless, and using a kitchen knife would not only look bad but also cause the cake to fall apart like a thousand-year-old egg.

  The two fools suddenly said, "My knife should be fine." Then he compared the thickness of the cake and asked Qin Shi Huang, "Is my knife about this long?" Qin Shi Huang kept a certain distance from him, measured it according to the situation at that time, stroked his chin and said, "It's almost the same."

  I took out the knife from the toolbox and washed it several times. This knife is said to be highly toxic, but I don't believe that nonsense. The poison from over 2000 years ago is just a bluff, you see those novels and legends where people get poisoned all the time, but not one of them actually died from it.

  Baozi picked up the knife and cut the cake into a mess, when she returned the knife to Jing Ke, Jing Ke said: "You play with it, I'll use it again and ask you for it." Which scared Wynn.

  Liu Bang pointed at the largest one and said: "I want this."

  Xiang Yu suddenly exploded, lifting Liu Bang into the air and shouting: "Do you have such a big appetite?" These two people had always had irreconcilable contradictions, each looking down on the other. Xiang Yu probably saw me and Baozi being affectionate together on my birthday and was reminded of his own painful past, plus the fact that Liu Bang had snatched the world from him back then, making his mood extremely gloomy. Moreover, when it came to dividing things up, these politicians were very particular about getting the biggest share, so you deserved to be lifted into the air for daring to want the largest piece.

  Baozi thought they were just joking around and didn't take them seriously. After sending the cake, he said: "Today is my birthday, I'm 26 years old, and I'm very happy to have so many people celebrating with me. Come on, eat."

  Li Shishi took a sip of cake and smiled: "Congratulations on your 26th birthday, sister."

  Bao Zi Qi said: "Xiao Nan, why don't you call me sister-in-law anymore?"

  Li Shishi said slyly, "Because I just want to remind my brother that it's time for him to formally marry you." Qin Shi Huang chimed in, "Yes, a 26-year-old woman should get married already." Baozi first chuckled and then suddenly touched her face, saying, "Do you guys think I'm old..."

  Li Shishi suddenly said to me: "Brother, where is the birthday gift you gave to your sister?"

  I was stunned, and even Er Qiang sent a package with a knife. As a boyfriend, he didn't make any gestures, which is really unreasonable. Liu Bang said on the rooftop at the right time: "Although I wasn't prepared either, but I have my most sincere blessings for you..."

  Cut it out, you're stealing my lines.

  I'm getting anxious, Li Shishi pulled me and complained: "Why are you so stupid, proposing to your sister?" Qin Shi Huang nodded with a smile: "Let's see if it can be done." This is equivalent to the emperor's golden words, granting a grand wedding.

  Everyone was staring at me, Liu Bang shouted loudly: "Qiangzi, stick to your own ideas..." was pinched by Xiang Yu and became silent. Xiang Yu said in a loud voice: "Xiao Qiang, just admit it!"...

  I took a look and thought, "Today is today," so I simply said to Baozi: "If you don't mind that I have no house, no car, no savings, and am a bit of a scoundrel - Baozi, will you marry me?"

  Li Shishi was stunned for a moment, then led the applause. Baozi said with some shyness amidst the crowd's clapping: "This matter... I need to ask my dad first."

  I said, Old Accountant had known our thing for a long time, he just waited until I went to get engaged and then opened his mouth.

  That's it for this matter then.

  I suddenly feel a heavy burden on my shoulders: responsibility, duty, and Liu Bang - Xiang Yu has thrown him onto my shoulders.

  Li Shishi asked me: "Older cousin, is there a sword at home?"

  I was startled: "What? My wife and your sister are married, but we didn't make a blood oath."

  "I don't have any gifts for you all, so I'll just dance a sword dance to liven things up instead."

  What am I going to get a sword for her? A few years ago, there were still some knives.

  Jing Ke's head was exceptionally bright today, he rushed into the toilet in a flash, holding a leather pouch, fortunately this leather pouch had never been used and was still wrapped in a plastic bag.

  Li Shishi took the leather pouch and first performed a "Sage Directing the Way", revealing her posture while dancing and singing: "In the past, there was a beauty named Gong Sun, one dance with sword moved all directions, onlookers were like mountains and rivers...". Li Shishi's body was slender and agile, her movements quick and neat, mainly because of those eyes, sometimes sharp and sometimes gentle. Holding a wooden stick and jumping around looked really good too, if only there wasn't a leather pouch on the end of the stick...

  Dinner was just a few small dishes and some wine, as we had all eaten our fill of cake. I gazed out at the sky, which was neither early nor late, and suddenly felt like going for a drive. "Come on," I said to Baozi, "I'll take you for a spin."

  When Baozi saw my cross-country motorcycle, she was immediately stunned. She asked me: "You said you helped someone move yesterday, didn't you go to help the museum move?"

  I swept her up in my arms and tossed her into the motorcycle sidecar, then straddled the bike and sped off towards our big bridge with a trail of black smoke and an otherworldly energy. Baozi was laughing wildly, and as we watched the sunset it seemed like we'd returned to that silly, innocent era once again.

  As the silhouette of me and Baozi, along with the sunset, formed a beautiful oil painting, I suddenly received a text message. I took out my blue mobile phone to check it, and Baozi said in disgust: "I'm telling you, can't you quit smoking for a bit and change your phone? Even remote controls look better than that thing."

  I ignored her, took a look, it was an unfamiliar number, the content of the text message was: Qiangzi, I forgot to tell you, your work for Tiangong is not in vain, at the beginning of the month there will be wages to collect, specifically, some small benefits will be given to you, such as opening a heavenly eye or something, but the days are not fixed, it's possible to have them earlier or later - do you know who I am?

  Liu Lao Liu! Who else could it be?

  I'll get back to you right away: Is this your phone number? Can't you first make a stone into gold for me?

  Liu Lao Liu replied: Don't hold out hope, I'm not even good at it myself. At most, I can only turn earwax into copper. This is a message I sent to you using my friend's phone - don't reply, I've left.

  I dialed the phone number and a man on the other end spoke in a low and gloomy tone, "Who is this?"

  "Where is that of yours?"

  "Tiě lǐng, gě hā ya?" translates to "Tie Ling, where are you going?"

  Liu Lao Liu has fled to the Northeast. After hanging up the phone, I was in a state of turmoil. It seems that the day is approaching, and I don't know what benefits the heavens will bestow upon me. Damn it, I'll soon have supernatural powers!

  Just then, I suddenly saw two black shadows flying quickly towards me. My body and legs didn't move, but I felt a chill run down my spine. It seemed that my heavenly eye had opened. Later, upon closer inspection, it turned out to be - two people skateboarding.