Chapter Twelve: The Laws of War

  I think Liu Bang, since he could see that Li Shishi had a certain charm, it means that the aesthetic view of the Han Dynasty should not be at odds with later generations. So I just can't figure out how he came up with those four words "heaven and earth". Otherwise, why did others become emperors? He really did it to that extent.

  I haven't had a chance to make him understand the principle that "someone else's dry rations (buns) can't be touched". There's something that's caught his attention, and as long as he doesn't bother me, that's for the best. As for whether or not he'll behave improperly, it's already completely outside of my consideration. Under my guidance, Baozi has become proficient in using all sorts of bricks - regular ones, 9-hole ones, even 40cm x 40cm tiles. And with her lightning-fast kick, aside from me, no one else in the world can dodge it.

  "With a 'whoosh' sound, Qin Shi Huang's toilet was flushed, and Li Shishi applauded. Jing Ke rushed over, panting, pushed her aside, put the vinegar on the table, and headed towards his room. I stopped him: "Jing Ke, wait! Why did you only buy one battery?" I saw that he had only inserted one battery into the semiconductor. Suddenly, a smug smile appeared on Jing Ke's face as he said mysteriously: "You didn't notice, did you? Actually, it can be used just by replacing one battery." I shouted in exasperation: "That way is more wasteful of electricity! That's why you're always changing batteries every day!" He ignored me and gave me a look as if I was an idiot, then grabbed Xiang Yu and said: "Do you believe it? The little people inside are all raised by me?"

  Liu Bang hugged his arms, looking very cool, as if he was modeling for an underwear advertisement.

  Because there were many people, Baozi cooked another pot of instant noodles. I brought out the long-unused square table and arranged it, gathering all these heroes from various corners and arranging them properly. The living room suddenly became very crowded. Xiang Yu insisted on sitting between Qin Shi Huang and Li Shishi, because Jing Ke was making a fuss, Liu Bang had to sit next to Baozi. I thought it was too crowded, so I took a bowl of noodles to the sofa to eat. Baozi looked at everyone gathered together and said happily: "Since we're all together, it's fate, let's go buy some wine later and have a party tonight." As she said this, she suddenly remembered, "Why don't we go out on the street later and buy two sets of clothes for Liu Ji and the others? When we get back, we can go to the supermarket and buy something to cook ourselves."

  As soon as I heard it, I was choked by the noodles and jumped up. Taking these 5 people out for a stroll is no better than having me run naked around the 3rd Ring Road at midnight. I hastily said: "No way, I still have to watch the store, they're all busy too."

  "Your crappy store isn't doing anything anyway, closing for an afternoon won't hurt, those who agree raise your hands."

  "I'm going." Li Shishi spoke up first, she gave me a glance, as if she understood what I was thinking without revealing it.

  "Is he angry or not? Has he ever seen the world?" He also asked Xiang Yu beside him, "Are you angry?"

  Baozi chimed in and said: "We haven't even asked this big guy's name yet?" Before I could think of how to respond, Xiang Yu had already said: "I am Xiang Yu."

  "Xiang Yu?" Baozi rested her chopsticks on her chin and asked Qin Shi Huang, "Is he in the same band as you guys?" She turned to me and asked, "Are Xiang Yu and Qin Shi Huang from the same dynasty?" Liu Bang hastily replied, "No!" But Xiang Yu didn't care, saying it was true. Baozi looked at the two of them, then smiled at me and said, "It seems your two friends don't know their history as well as I do - hey, do you think Xiang Yu and Ying Zheng ever actually met?"

  "Touching oil, I had seen him before when I was hungry." Qin Shi Huang said.

  "Haha, you're really funny, I'm talking about Qin Shi Huang from history."

  Qin Shi Huang turned to me: "Which Qin Shihuang is he referring to? Is it also called Ying Zheng?"

  I swallowed the whole bowl of noodles and weakly said, "Aren't we going out? Go next door and borrow Xiao Wang's van from the supermarket."

  "Baozi excitedly said: 'Right, 7 people is just right, when we come back we'll add 50 yuan of oil for him...' and then left."

  After Baozi left, I slammed the bowl on the table and shouted: "You all listen to me!" The five of them looked up at me in confusion. It was only then that I realized how rare it was for someone to dare speak to them like this in their lives. But I didn't care - they came to my place, ate my food, drank my drinks, wore my clothes, and even hooked up with my girl. What made them think I had such a good temper?

  "I'm making a pact with you three chapters (I didn't notice at the time that this idiom was coined by Liu Bang) - later when we go out, don't talk to strangers, especially you, Liu Bang! If I see you being overly familiar with someone again, I'll beat you up." As I said this, I glanced at Qin Shi Huang, whose majestic aura at the dinner table had already intimidated Liu Bang into silence. He hastily expressed his obedience.

  "And, don't touch anything you see without permission, and if you don't know what it's used for, don't shout. Remember to ask me when we get back. The last one is also the most important one, don't leave my side... it's so far." I really didn't know what to say, so I paced back and forth a few steps, "This world is actually very dangerous (you should go back to your own time)."

  Actually, I wanted to keep a few of them, but the current situation is not better than the one who led the sheep and wolf and held a basket of vegetables to cross the single-plank bridge. Without thinking hard, there's no way out. Fortunately, the new Liu Bang was scared by me, Xiang Yu is thinking about Yu Ji with all his heart, and the other three shouldn't be a big problem.

  I heavily found two sets of spring and autumn seasonal clothes for Liu Bang and Xiang Yu to change into, Baozi has been pressing the car horn downstairs, Baozi is not good at driving, but can move the car from next door to my doorstep.

  I stood at the staircase entrance, letting them go down one by one: "Jing Ke, pull up your zipper! Ying Ge, brother will take you to experience the people's livelihood, don't reveal your identity; Liu Bang..."

  Liu Bang: "Me me me me!"

  I: “……”

  Li Shishi gave me a meaningful look, as if to reassure me, but also seemed to be mocking me. Anyway, this girl probably understood everything.

  Because I took good preventive measures, everything went smoothly until everyone got on the bus. I turned the key and the bread hummed twice before moving forward half a meter. Suddenly, Xiang Yu behind me asked: "How long does it take to get to Hubei by sitting in this?"

  Baozi turned back to Xiang Yu who was sitting with Qin Shi Huang and said, "We have to wait for the water to recede before we can go back - by the way, I don't think I've heard of any flooding this year?"

  I perked up my ears, but didn't dare to speak nonsense. I thought Xiang Yu was thinking of Yu Ji, but unexpectedly he was so sensitive to "moving" things. Except for Baozi, everyone on the car was sitting in it for the first time. As soon as Xiang Yu asked, they forgot about their previous agreement and Jing Er was the first to question me, pointing at the radio on the car and saying: "Is there a little person inside here too?" Because Liu Bang and Li Shishi were leaning against my back, I heard their whispers. Liu Bang said: "Why does this thing move by itself?" Li Shishi also whispered: "I think it's because something is working inside (she was right)." Qin Shi Huang overheard the two of them talking and loudly said with disdain: "It's simple, you don't see Qiangzi holding a household item to control it, does it hurt?" He used the car key as a whip.

  I took a careful look at Baozi's reaction, seeing her smiling brightly. When she saw me looking at her, she smiled at me: "Your friends are really humorous."

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  The number of words is almost enough for a new book list, Xiaohua asks for recommendations.